There is no such thing as a perfect friend.
I think we are hard on those around us at times. We expect a lot out of them and then when they let us down, rise up short, or fail to meet those unsaid standards, we are disappointed, discouraged, and frustrated. We fail to see that people are human. They will say the wrong thing at times, hurt our feelings, and even let us down with – or without intending to.
It’s imperfection at its best.
I think that’s what’s so precious about parenting. We love our children regardless. We know ahead of time that they will make mistakes – yet we love them. We expect them to be angry with us at times and we forgive them. It’s built inside of us; that ability to love despite being hurt. We could use some of that sometimes in our friendships. Our friends are just as human as our children are. They have their own quirks and personalities that are pre-built. We can’t change them. We can inspire them, love on them, encourage them, and pray for them – but we can’t change them. We need to understand ahead of time that there will come a moment in time where they may not be there for us in our time of need.
If we are always looking for perfection in a friend, I think we may just always be looking for a friend. There is no perfection to be found. But there is laughter to be found in the cheer that someone else’s charm brings your life. There is a special bond that can be found when someone doesn’t understand your heart and yet still loves you and supports you. There is freedom to be found when you share something you feel silly about or something that deeply humbles or embarrasses you and you are met with wisdom or camaraderie in the disclosure of an equally silly or embarrassing thing from your friend’s heart.
Friendships need room to breathe and grow. We only suffocate them if we put confines on them. We stifle any natural blooming that could otherwise take place.
We all could use some slack when it comes to our own role in friendships. We let our friends down at times or fail to be there for them. We don’t call or write as often as we should and we forget birthdays. We say the wrong thing at the wrong time and we get our nose bent out of shape too easily. We could use some grace extended our way at our “less-than-perfect” ways. And so do we need to offer it in return.
There is no such thing as a perfect friend but there are really GREAT friends. We just need to see that sometimes they are standing right in front of us – imperfections and all.