Tuesday, October 25, 2011

I'm Not Leaving

Sometimes I just want to tell Satan to spend his time and energies elsewhere. Actually, I always want to tell him this. But some times, more than others, I feel like he thinks he can defeat me. I feel like he must think he will win my soul because the spiritual battle and warfare can feel sooo intense.

You can almost feel the heat on your cheeks.

When these times come, I want to shout at the top of my lungs, “I’m not leaving! I’m not leaving my God! So give up!”

I guess it’s the warrior in me. The rebellious part of me that refuses to become a victim. Sure, sometimes I whine and groan like one – but when push comes to shove, I usually end up with a fighting spirit somewhere inside of me. Some part of me that wants to engage and not lose whatever battle it is that is waging over my head.

I’m not leaving.

There is no “out.” No matter how you feel, you have to decide for yourself that whatever comes your way; you will still serve and obey your Lord. It’s the only way. It’s kind of like marriage. For better or for worse – you’re in it. Forever.

Sometimes yelling does some good. Some times things need to be said. Sometimes tears need to fall. But when push comes to shove, don’t let Satan think he even has a hint of a chance at gaining access to your heart.

Tell him you’re not leaving. And then tell God.

My guess is, if you’re anything like me and you get that determined mindset to take over and you just decide that you’re in the battle to get stronger (because you’re certainly not going to throw up your hands and give in to defeat) that you will find the war starts to recede. The attacks come less often or with less strength.

It’s because when you call upon the power of the Lord, when you decide to use your faith as a weapon and cry out “I’m not leaving! Bring it on!”  --- there are stronger forces at work than simply your own strength.  Sometimes God is simply waiting to see if we feel He is worth fighting for or not.

I hate battles. Even though they make me stronger with each one, I still hate them. They hurt and they leave me with scars. But there is no “out” for me, in my walk with the Lord.

I’m not leaving.


Tammy said...

I love this post. We have a powerful God who is fighting with us and I love that. Great post for thought today. Thanks so much!

Dionna said...

Thanks for stopping by, Tammy!