Friday, February 15, 2013

When Your Heart is Pricked

Have you ever felt like at any moment you would cry?  Like the tears are lodged in your throat and eyes, ready to pour out at the slightest harsh word or sensitive commercial thrown before your eyes?

And yet – you’re not sure why.

There is no BIG problem set before you to solve. No crisis involving your children.  No hurt feelings that need to be resolved.  Just a “blah” feeling accompanied by tears beneath the surface.

When I have these times if I sit and think long enough, I can usually pinpoint my inner sorrow to some word said carelessly that bothered me on a deeper level. Or an action done by another that wounded my very soul.  We try to shake it off and act like it’s “no big deal” but inside – it IS a big deal. It has pricked us. It has made a dent in our heart.

And I can’t help but think that the inner sorrow comes from wanting more. Wanting better. Wanting different.

And so we go on with our business and the well of tears rises within us – refusing to be forgotten. Begging to be noticed. So it can deal. So it can heal.

I know that sometimes I just can’t think clearly until I let my inner emotion out. And then it feels so good. So freeing.

I no longer sit in bondage.

Do you feel like you want to cry today? Are you struggling to know why? Be honest with yourself. It’s okay to admit and recognize that someone has pricked your heart.

See life for what it is. Allow yourself to see your feelings for what they are. But then pick yourself up, and smile. Love yourself. Declare to stand taller and wiser.  Peel off the thorns and let yourself be gentle and vulnerable again.  For emotions are nothing to be ashamed of. They teach us. Guide us. Free us.

Tears may come, but joy too – will rise again.

“Jesus wept.”  John 11:35

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