Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Coloring My Life, My Way

I’ve always been a “color inside of the lines” kind of girl. A rule follower.

It’s not something I intended. I didn’t train myself to always do the right thing. It just was born into me, I guess.  Fear always kept me in line.

But I get tired of always coloring inside of the lines. I get tired of doing exactly what is expected of me.

I married a “color outside of the lines” kind of guy. He’s shown me how to step outside of the boundaries and to be more creative. He’s taught me to roam a little more.

I find that I want to sometimes break the rules now. Not in a “I want to be bad” kind of way. But in an “I want to be a unique individual” kind of way. 

I don’t want to let someone else do the thinking for me. I don’t want to quietly conform when I’m not sure I trust the direction I’m supposed to be headed in. I don’t want “average” when maybe I can go for “great!”

I was a dreamer as a kid. Part of me has always been a dreamer. But it’s hard to be a dreamer and a kid that colors inside of the lines dutifully at the same time. You can’t break out of the mold. You can’t experiment with your own talents, strengths, and dreams.  You can’t tweak your likes, dislikes, goals, etc if you are always doing what is expected of you.

I don’t want to let others tell me how to live my life. I don’t want to simply be a support system or a cheerleader. I want to turn on my own roads in life. Have my own adventures. Try my own things.

I want to color outside of the lines.

I want to go slow when everyone else is going fast so I can take it all in.  And I want to be free to make my own mistakes. Change my mind.

So I want to break the unwritten rules in life that say I “can’t” do something or that things aren’t “normally” done a certain way.

I want to dream with abandon and go for them anyways. And use lots of colors along the way.

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