We NEED Better

We need to DO better.

We need to be better friends. Better parents. Better fighters, for what is moral and right.

We should speak up more. Speak up less. Be wiser. More understanding.

We need to be more discerning. Gentler. More compassionate.

We need to be THERE for one another. Not just in words, but in presence.

We need to strive for excellence in all we do. Go the extra mile. Persevere. Run to win the race in whatever we undertake in life.

We need to think of ourselves less, yet take care of our emotions and feelings, more.

We need to BE better.

We need to have more patience. Slow down. Laugh more.

We need to forgive more readily. Love more freely.

We need to stop taking everything so personally. Let things go. Move on.

We need to yell when things are unfair, and cheer when things are good.

We need to KNOW what is better.

Life is flying by. Slipping through our grasp. People are hurting, dying, and feeling alone. We sooo need to love better.

I want to do better. I want to be better. I want to know what’s better, and love better.

Do you?

What Are They Scared Of?

They try to hide us. The world.

They try to pretend we don’t exist.

They want to shut us up. Put us down. Mock us. Prove we are lunatics. All because of our faith.

What are they scared of?

I think we make them see themselves as they are, as if they are looking in a mirror and seeing underneath their own skin – into their heart and soul, for the first time.

They don’t like what they see.

They don’t like what they think WE see.

But don’t they know, we still love them? HE still loves them?

Don’t they know we don’t mean them harm?

No.

They still do what they can to hurt us. Kill us. Imprison us. Take away our voice.

And yet the WORD lives on. It cannot be quenched. It cannot be killed.

And it never will. For God is the beginning and the end. The first and the last.

Now and forevermore.

And deep down – the world knows it. Maybe that’s why they run so scared.

This Need We Have, For Acceptance

From the moment we are born, it seems that we all crave acceptance. It starts with our babies craving to be held and loved. And it continues on throughout our whole lives. This need we have. For acceptance.

For some of us, this need is fostered by families who never seemed to value, or appreciate us. For others of us, there’s something inside of us, that truly seems to be our own worst enemy, as we look out into the world and see others who we think are better, more beautiful, smarter, more gracious, more athletic – whatever. Whatever it is that we think we are lacking.

We often, don’t give ourselves a chance. Not when we think we’d be better off if we were someone else.

That’s why “he’s” are changing into “she’s.” “She’s” are changing into “he’s.”  “He’s are liking “He”s instead of “She’s” and vice versa. There is no self-acceptance.

The thing is – if we can’t accept ourselves, no one else will ever accept us either. We can change our looks, our gifts, our jobs, our surroundings – but we are still “we” on the inside. Our brains, our organs, our very souls – cannot be changed. We were made to be who we are.

Everyone – EVERYONE – is a gift. A unique, special, priceless gift. EVERYONE has something to add of value to this world. Sometimes, yes, we are hindered by others in our life, or our surroundings. It may take courage and great strength to seek out healthier environments and input into our lives. But who we have in our lives, doesn’t change who WE are. No one can put a label on us that we don’t accept!

We all have a God-given identity. And it’s beautiful. We can spit in the face of it, we can try to change it – but it still exists underneath all of those layers.

YOU are valuable. YOU are irreplaceable. YOU have what it takes to be a man, to be a woman, to be a husband or a wife. Believe in yourself. Believe in the God who made you. It’s the only way you will ever truly feel peace. It’s the only way you will ever truly feel love.

Accept yourself as you were made. For you were not a mistake. You were not a “mess-up.”

You were – and – are – a gift. And you can’t be replaced. If you lose yourself, we lose you too.

You are loved for being you. The REAL you. The “created” you.

I promise.

Do You Ever Wish, You Could Help The Whole World?

Do you ever just wish you could help the whole world? That you could help every child who cries, or every person who doesn’t know what it feels like to be loved?

Sometimes, I wish that. I wish that I could help everyone.

I wish that I could give self-esteem, to that teen who doesn’t have it. That teen girl, who looks for value in makeup, hairstyles, beauty, and relationships. Or that teen boy who thinks he has to have a 6 pack of abs, and a beauty on his arm. I wish I could show them that high school doesn’t last forever. That beauty and image are hollow things to fill their hearts with.

I wish I could hug that person who has tears streaming down their face, as they are thinking about trying to kill themselves. Or the person who has no tears at all, because they don’t want to feel. They don’t want to hurt. So they are numb.

I wish I had enough money to help all the Third World countries so that no child would ever starve again, and no mother would have to stand by and helplessly watch.

Oh, how I wish.

Life can feel so helpless at times. The obstacles can seem so overwhelming.

But, I refuse to feel helpless.  Convicted, yes. Saddened, definitely. Empathy, totally. But, I refuse to feel helpless.

Recently, I scrolled through post after post on twitter, of teens who mentioned being depressed, discouraged, and struggling with their self esteem. It may have been something small – but I decided to start replying to some of them and encouraging them. Maybe I’m the only one who will choose to speak to them in their moment of pain - I don’t know. But I refuse to stand by. I refuse to know someone is struggling, and do nothing about it.

There are so many heartbroken people out there. So many, who struggle with their own image. They need love. They need encouragement. They need to feel like they are heard, and that they matter.

I may not be able to help the whole world – but maybe, I can help just one.

For today.

And then maybe tomorrow, I can help another one.

It’s a start.

I Don't Need a Bucket List

Lots of people have “bucket lists.” Things they want to do that year, or throughout their whole lives.

I think it’s truly great.

In fact, my husband had a bucket list when he turned 50. He had all sorts of fun things on it to do – not just large things. He wanted to skip down a street, roll down a hill, do a dot-to-dot, climb a tree – and more. My favorite things were the little things he chose to do. The things that reminded him to enjoy the simple things in life.

It was fun to watch him, and it was fun to do some of his “bucket list” things with him.

But for me, I don’t need a bucket list. And I’ll tell you why.

I have done far more in my life, than I ever could have dreamed of doing. I have ziplined in Guatemala, climbed the Eiffel Tower, touched a dolphin, and seen a lightening storm over the ocean. I’ve seen the miracle of birth with my two daughters, felt the love and friendship with someone who doesn’t even speak my language, and felt the beauty of romance.

I've touched a rock that someone thousands of years old, touched. I've kissed the face of someone I've loved dearly - who has passed on. I've gotten chills down my arms as God has revealed that He protected me and answered a deeply-held prayer request. 

I've seen the Grand Canyon, Mount Rushmore, walked the Mall of America, stood in the FOUR CORNERS, gone on a swamp ride, seen a grizzly through binoculars, white water rafted, gone up the side of a volcano, hula danced, seen a carving of Michelangelo, and gone horseback riding on the beach.

I've been able to do A LOT.

I have travelled to more places than I ever thought I’d visit – Ireland, Jamaica, Guatemala, Panama, Scotland, England, Belgium, and France.

I have lived in many different states – Oregon, Nevada, Idaho, and now Texas.

I have gone on road trips all across the U.S.

Most all of these things were unexpected gifts in my life. I didn’t pursue them. I didn’t dream of them. They just naturally came about.

I’m blessed. And I know it.

Everything I do from here on out, is just ‘extra’ for me. I’ve already experienced, and seen more than I could have dreamed possible. So everything I’m able to do from this point on, is a “cherry” on top of the huge cake I’ve already been allowed to eat in my life.

I don’t need a bucket list. The only things I desire from this point on have to do with those people I love, good health, and rich friendships. Sure, there are things that I think would be cool to do. But I don’t NEED to do them. I’m happy enough with what I’ve already been able to do.

Life truly is a gift. We just have to realize when we’ve unwrapped it. And I’ve gotten more gifts in this life than I deserve. How could I ever ask for more?

Fighting To Be Treated Right

Sometimes it feels like you just have to fight for everything in your life. You have to fight to be treated right.

For example, when we moved into a house rental upon moving to Texas, we noted everything wrong on our walk-in sheet. Then when it was time to get our return deposit check, we noticed we were deducted a huge chunk of change to fix the very things we’d noted were already there when we first moved in. Damage not caused by us. So we had to stand up for ourselves to try and get the money we were due.

That’s just one example of a long list of things that it feels like our family has had to fight for in recent years.

We’ve had to fight to be treated right.

It would be so easy to give up. It’s so easy to get discouraged. Sometimes the ‘fight’ is draining. It’s stressful and it takes a lot out of you. You don’t even always win. Sometimes you’re treated unfairly and you just have to swallow and move on. But it can be hard.

I think sometimes the world expects us to give up. It at least hopes we will. It can be easy to take advantage of people. Bully them. Walk right over them to put yourself and your needs first.

But sometimes we need to engage in the fight. We need to remind Satan (and the world) that we are warriors and that even though we get discouraged and tired, we have fight in us. We have fight in us especially when it’s something worthwhile that we are fighting for.

Life IS a battle. You win some and you lose some. You get beat up along the way. But to walk away doesn’t mean you win. It simply means you chose to give up before you even tried to fight for what you felt was right.

I do get tired of feeling like we have to fight to be treated fairly in this life. I do get tired of feeling like we’ve been taken advantage of. But I believe in who I am enough to know that sometimes you just have to stand up, use your voice, and say “this isn’t right.”

If you feel like you are in a ‘fight’ for justice right now for yourself or someone you love, hang in there. Maintain your integrity in the process and have faith that whatever the outcome, you are doing the right thing in addressing the issue.

Don’t give those war-wagers an inch more of your heart and life than they’ve already taken.

Problems Are Tougher Today Than They Used To Be

It’s true. We live in an age where new problems, challenges, and hurdles present themselves to parents. Tough problems and challenges. Issues that our parents and grandparents never faced. Things that haven’t even been written about in “self-help” books yet.

We live in an exciting time. Yet, a time where we can’t always refer to the past to help us out with a problem. Sometimes we have to forge our way through it…. Alone.

Schools are different than when we were young. Cell phones are allowed in a lot of them, and rules have changed. Curriculum has changed and the students and teachers themselves, have changed.

Kids socialize through their phones or online in great part, now. They don’t stand in the living room talking on the landline phone where you can snoop from the other room. No, they can text, message, or snapchat in quiet – while you’re in the room.

We have cyberbullying now. Sexting. Cutting. Selfies. Online dating. None of these things were issues when I was a girl. Not all of technology is bad. Just like not all of life is bad. But with everything new that evolves or changes in our life, there can be hurdles to overcome as a parent.  How do you protect your child? How do you give them space without letting them run amok? How do you give them self esteem without indulging them? How do you stay close, without smothering?

So many questions.

So much information to take in and digest! So much time involved in trying to keep the pace.

For caring parents, just because they have a problem, doesn’t mean it’s a life-altering one. It doesn’t matter. Being a parent is still tough. It’s tough to instill guidelines and boundaries in a world that doesn’t have them. It’s tough to help your kids and teens feel ‘accepted’ without being ‘corrupted.’

So, do what you can do. Research what you can research. Set those guidelines and boundaries that are in the best interest of your child and your family. Talk often – even if your kids are annoyed with you. Because that’s what a loving parent does. It loves, protects, and sees the big picture – even when no one else can see it.

Parenting may be tougher today than a few generations ago – but we were called to parent these kids in THESE times. You have what it takes, even if you are on bended knee in prayer and tears some nights.

Hang in there. Keep loving. Keep believing in your family.  For they are irreplaceable.

Leaving Something Behind That Says, "I Was Here"

I was reading someone’s blog post recently about something that their husband had built for them. It reminded me of the different places I’ve lived and the different homes that I’ve had in my life. So many of them hold special memories for me.  You can never take away a memory, but sometimes you do have to leave special things behind.

For example, I had to leave two rosebushes that represented my two daughters. They still grow (I imagine) in the yard of the home where I brought my second daughter home from the hospital. That was the same house where my husband built me a trellis with a heart on it. We cut it down and took it with us to our next house. But alas, this last move, we had to leave it behind. So my beloved “love” trellis with the heart still graces the back yard there.  As does a spot known only to us where we buried our beloved cat. He was an indoor cat, and we just knew he’d love being out in the yard with all the birds that he always enjoyed watching.

I remember the house I grew up in. We carved (our initials, I think it was) in the cement when it was poured on our back patio. I imagine our mark is still there.

These are some of the memories and marks that I know I’ve left behind in my life. I’m sure there will be many more. Spots in time that we leave behind us. I think of things like this when I’m in Europe or in the East and I’m touching a very old building or bridge. I wonder who has gone before me and left a certain stain or mark behind them? Were they happy? What was their life like? What was that moment in time like for them?

We live. We breathe. We leave behind marks of our life. Maybe it’s something carved in cement or on a tree. Maybe it’s something we’ve planted or built. But we’ve added something to this world by being there.

We leave part of ourselves behind. Part of who we were at that moment in time. Something that says, “I was here.”

And I love that.

The Beauty of England, Scotland, and Ireland

Our family recently got to travel overseas for a brief stint. I am so thankful for the opportunities I’ve been given to see God’s world. It never fails to amaze me. It is so beautiful.

I find big cities beautiful. I find the countryside beautiful. I find people with their differing customs, accents, and way of living… beautiful.

And I just wanted to share a little slice of it with you.

Moving the Line of What is Acceptable

I was talking to my girls a few years ago about music. We were downloading some new songs from Itunes and one of my daughter’s was asking me what some of my favorite current hits were. I finally mentioned one that I liked, but was hesitant to buy because of the singer’s reputation.  She told me, “That has a bad word in it.” Really? I hadn’t even noticed. She told me if I listened carefully that I would very clearly be able to hear it. Which brought up a short little discussion on content in songs.

When I was growing up (yes, I can’t believe I’ve relegated myself to using those lines!)…I informed my daughter that bad language in music wasn’t allowed on radios. Now, it’s commonplace.

Why do you think that is?

I think it’s because we’ve allowed it. We’ve desensitized ourselves to what is bad and what is okay. 

Say you have a song that is really vulgar. Everyone is in an uproar about it. But then another song comes out that isn’t quite as bad and so it’s allowed. Then down on the road, more songs come out. Some push the limit, others go back to that one song that was a little “edgy” but allowed and so they too – are allowed, because “hey” – they aren’t “as bad” as the other songs.  This continues for a while until you start having a market saturated by songs that once would have been deemed “unacceptable.” The line keeps moving. And it’s moving in the wrong direction. Instead of starting back where we didn’t allow any of these words, thoughts, or actions; we’ve allowed them in small doses because they aren’t “quite as bad” as some others out there. But the limit keeps getting pushed to worse and worse – more vulgar and more vulgar and so the ones that aren’t “as bad” also keep getting pushed because everyone thinks they are tame “in comparison.”

Just what is “our comparison?”

Whether it’s movies, music, commercials, television, news…whatever….we’ve allowed the line of what is acceptable to continue to move, when in reality it should be back where it started. No bad language. No untruths. No demeaning of people. No sex. The list goes on and on.

For me – God’s Word is what I hold everything in comparison to. His Word never changes. It was relevant yesterday and it will be relevant tomorrow. It doesn’t get to be “old fashioned.” It’s amazing that way.  His values and morals are for our protection. And the line of what is and is not acceptable never moves or changes.

I need to hold what I listen to, see, think, and act upon – on His Word. Always. Just because something is “less bad” doesn’t mean it’s good. That fact will never change…no matter what society does or does not allow.

The World Really Needs REAL

We put our best foot forward for others. We look our best, we act our best, and we showcase our best. We spiffy up our houses so they look their BEST.

But we can’t all be at our best all of the time.

I’d venture to say we live out of our natural state far more than we live within our best state.

In a world where we have glossy images in the magazines, everyone’s successful highlights in social media online, and brand names calling to us, telling us we will be worthwhile if we own them…..everyone desperately needs something authentic, genuine, and REAL.

We need someone who isn’t all polished – and yet is still insanely warm, gracious, and loveable.

We need people who have wrinkles and wear generic clothes, yet are still stylish.

We need to see that someone can cry and not be ashamed. Have a different opinion than us and be gracious about it. Eat fatty food sometimes and love it. REAL.

Real life is flawed, messy, and confusing at times. Real life is full of learning situations, hurt feelings, and apologies. Real life trips, drops things, laughs at awkward moments, and says the wrong thing at the wrong time.

The world needs REAL in its role models; in it’s heroes. Not polished and perfect. But real.

Let’s see someone stumble over their words, say something that is politically incorrect (but the truth), and dare to own up to their actions by apologizing.

The world craves real. It NEEDS real.

Let’s be real, applaud real, and support more authenticity and genuine hearts in those we adore and emulate.

Real life can be funny, attractive, and desirable. And it’s freeing too – to not have to have it all together.

Real. If you reach out, you can almost touch it. It’s there – waiting to be found.

They May Use a Different Word, But It's the Same Thing (England Vs. America)

We recently had a young acquaintance from England come and stay with us for a month. It was a fun and eye opening experience as we immediately noticed all the differences in products and in the terms we used to identify those products.

I guess I assumed that since we both spoke English, that there wouldn’t be that much of a difference in how we spoke. But I was wrong. There were so many different terms for things that I started to keep a list, and even then, I couldn’t keep track of them all!

My post on the differences between North and South America (You can find that here:) has been so popular with my readers, that I thought it would be fun to do one on the different names for things from England to America.

So here goes:

In America, we have turn signals. In England, they call them “indicators.”

In  America, we have Netflix. In England, they have “Lovefilm.”

In America, our kids go to school on a yellow bus. Have as long as I can remember. In England, they go to school on white and black busses and they are double decker busses!

I buy boxes of granola cereal at the store here in America. In England, they call it “crunchy nut cereal.”

In England, they refer to America’s “shopping carts” as “trolleys.”

In America, we cook on a stove. In England, they call it a “hob.”

Commercials in America are called “adverts” in England.

Popsicles? Those are ice lolleys.

A simple game of tic tac toe? That is called “nots and crosses.”

I get tons and tons of plastic bags from the grocery store. In England, they call those “packets.” And they fold them into triangles to save space and for neat storage. (I was taught how to do this and it really is handy!)

In America, we have q-tips. In England, they have “earbuds.”

In America, we have Chapstick. In England, they have “lip ice.”

In America, we have ping pong. In England, they have “table tennis.”

When I need to fuel up, in America, I go to the “gas station.” In England, they fuel up at a “petrol station.”

A simple piece of pecan pie (said as pee-kon pie) is pronounced “peekun” pie in England.

One of the funniest differences I ran across was when we were playing a game and our guest needed an eraser for his pencil. He looked at my husband and asked if he had any “rubbers.” You guessed it. An “eraser” in America is called a “rubber” in England. We had to explain to him that “rubber” means something entirely different here!

A trunk of a car in America – in England, is a “boot.”

A ketchup packet at your local fast food restaurant is referred to as a “sachet.”

“Posh” in England is simply referred to as “rich” in America.

And instead of getting the “mail,” – you go and get the “post.”

Lastly? “Just now” really means “later” if you’re from England. Try and wrap your head around that!

The differences are plenty. But it was fun to see that so many common items like band-aids are referred to by an entirely different word if you’re from England.

Oh, how the world gets smaller, the more we learn about each other though! And what deeper understanding we gain in the process.

We are all the same. We just come at life from a different perspective.

Some Things You Don't Think Will Ever Touch Your Life

Some things you don’t think will ever touch your life.

When I was growing up, I never in a million years would have predicted that I would become a stepmom.

I never thought I would have been so personally touched by suicide. Not just by friends, but within my own family.

I never thought I would grapple with fear and anxiety.

I never could have dreamed how becoming a mom would affect me so intensely and irrevocably.

I never thought I’d be touched or impacted by so many things. Good. And bad.

You just don’t think some things will come close to your home turf. You don’t think you’ll have to deal with certain “hills” and “battlegrounds” in life.

Until you do.

Until they DO touch your life. Deeply.

Then in that moment, we all have a choice of how to step forward. Do we let ourselves become people who are stripped of courage, faith, love, and hope? Or do we become people of resolve, trust, insight, and compassion?

I have found that in my weakest moments; in my moments of deepest hurts, that later on, God has indeed used those in my life to either make me stronger – or He’s used them to help someone else in my life, through what I went through.

I’ve learned that although I wish some moments had never touched my life, they have always shown me deeper blessings and truths at some point. In some way.

You see, God isn’t about to leave us the same. Unchanged. He wants to get our attention. Grow us. Speak to us. Move us. We can’t sit still and stay untouched by life. Someone, somewhere, at some point will get to us.

And no matter what happens, we will be changed. We will be impacted. And we will be touched. By not only what happens to us – but by what happens to those we love.

That’s how it’s supposed to be.

No one should ever be left untouched. For if you don’t hurt, you don’t love.

It's Not All Doom and Gloom Out There

There is a lot of sadness in the world. Every time we hear awful news, we can think ‘not again.’ It can seem as if we don’t even have time to digest previous happenings before some new tragedy unfolds.

Sometimes it can feel like that’s all that is going on. Bad stuff.  Maybe it’s because we feel those emotions so deeply. We carry them around with us for awhile. It takes us time to recover.

But good things happen too. And they are happening today. Around us. It’s not ALL bad out there. I see the good going on too. God is still good and He’s still DOING good.

I think we expect ‘good’ to be normal. We deem the ‘bad’ as not normal. In reality, BOTH are normal parts of a life.  Because we see the good things as things that should always be going on in our normal life, we don’t register them as much. We don’t see that they happen often. We are blessed OFTEN.

Yes. There is bad going on in the world. We live in a hurting world. But there is also good going on.  We just need to open our eyes a little bit more to see it. We need to not let it sweep by in a whiff – but digest it just as we do the hard things. Let the emotions of the good be felt just as deeply as the bad. Tears of praise and gratitude can stick with us just as long as grief, if we allow them to!

We do ourselves a huge misservice to think it’s all “doom and gloom” out there. I’d like to challenge you to see the “praise and glory” in your world instead. I think it will rattle your world as you see that angels are working just as hard (if not harder) than the demons.

Life is a battle. Yes. But every battle doesn’t end in a loss. There are plenty of wins going on in life today. Look for them. SEE them. Feel them. Love them.

And thank God for them.

The Door

We are in a new place. In a new house. A new room to sleep in each night.  When I wake up, I look at the ceiling, the room, and the door. And I think about all the different places I’ve slept where I’ve looked at different ceilings and different doors.

The door is actually, a crucial part of the home. Something most people don’t even really notice. They just walk through it; focused on where they are headed. But the door is very symbolic.

It is through the door, that I brought my babies home from the hospital to join our family and change our life forever.

It is through a door, that I walked into a room to view my grandfather in a casket and say goodbye. I knew that an emotional moment would take place on the other side of that door.

My husband carried me over the threshold through the door of our motel; the night we got married.

I’ve walked through the doorway of many hospital rooms to love on people dear to me. Some in pain, some experiencing the excitement of new life in a baby.

The door.

You can’t avoid the door. Every room has one.  You can’t enter or exit without going through it.

Just as every life has a door.  We will enter and we will exit.  One doorway leads to eternal life and one; one does not.

Something so commonplace in life. The door. Something we use daily and don’t think much about it. We take it for granted. We ignore it. We fail to see its significance despite what we turn the handle to see on the other side. As in life. We often take our lives for granted and fail to think about what is on the other side.

God says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” (Mathew 7:7)

The door. An ever important part of life.

When They Tell You To "Do It Afraid"

I hear over and over again about how we shouldn’t live life in our comfort zones. That we need to stretch ourselves. Do it ‘afraid’ or It’s not about us.

All true. In a way.

I do think there is balance that is needed in a life. I think we were created with certain bents and personalities for a reason. After all, not everyone was meant to bungee jump or skydive. Some of us not only are afraid to do those things, we weren’t meant to do those things. They are not in our make-up. They aren’t “us.”

God tells us to “come as you are.” And He made me “as I am.” So I have to deduce that certain parts of my personality are meant to be.

I’m meant to be cautious. Thoughtful. I’m meant to love to laugh. I’m not meant to be a risk-taker. Now, knowing that about myself gives me a lot of freedom. It helps me not feel so pressured to do things that aren’t who I am really about. On the other hand, knowing that, also means that I need to be careful not to let that hinder me in life. I can’t use that as an excuse to not engage or do things that maybe God is calling me to do.

For sometimes we ARE meant to go outside of our comfort zones. And in the process, we learn to love a new side of ourselves. A new side of our lives.

We have to carefully evaluate everything we say ‘yes’ to in life. We have to fully understand ourselves, our limitations, and our boundaries. We need to know how we will probably respond in certain situations and times. Weigh all of that together as we seek to find our answer.

It’s not as simple as ‘do it afraid.’ Or, ‘we aren’t meant to live in our comfort zones.’ For, yes, we are to go outside of our own little worlds – but I think we’re not meant to go outside of our gifting. And we DO each have a gifting!!

You are who you are. God made you as such a unique, woven together individual. Live in your strengths the best that you can. Push yourself sometimes to grow and stretch – but don’t do things that you were never meant to do. Things you shouldn’t do. Things that are not YOU.

For God says to COME AS YOU ARE. And He made you that way.

The "Now" Always Becomes the "Back Then"

We can get so caught up in our “now’s.” It’s only natural to. The pain can hurt so intensely. The love can overwhelm us. All we see is the heightened emotion of what we are currently going through.

Some times the “now” is all we can see. It feels like nothing will ever change. We fail to see how we could ever fight with the man we just fell in love with. How we could ever feel alive and well again after fighting an illness or disease for so long. We don’t know how the pain of something will ever pass – for it’s so close to our heart. So deep. Strong. The tears rise up in our throats so often.

But happen it does.

Time passes. The sun comes out again and we awake to that day that turns out to be different than the rest. We turned a corner.

No longer do we feel the sting of that pain quite so harshly.

We feel the change. Of something.

And eventually, the corner of change, too, is gone.

The “now” – the “now” that overshadowed our whole world and took over everything – becomes the “back then.”

 A shadow behind us. A glimmer in the past. A piece of the whole story of our life.

We reminisce. We see in hindsight, what we couldn’t see in the “now.” We see “more” of the “whole.” And we are fuller, more complete because of what we’ve been through – good or bad.

We may still feel a touch of those deep emotions from the “back then” – but they have new meaning. New depths. For life has added to them in some way or form.

You see, “now” isn’t all we have. We have so much more. And if you just hang in there, things will change. Time will change them. For good or bad. But whichever it is, that too, will change. And  you will look in the rearview mirror of your heart and see that the “now” you never thought would change has become, somehow, the “back then.” It’s gone. Over. Completed.

New hurdles and joys will always await us. That’s the beauty of navigating life. So enjoy your “now.” Hang in there and grit your teeth in your “now.” For before you know it, it will turn into your “back then” and you will reach out to touch it with your heart and see how it made you into who you are today.

Someone more complete.