Everything You Do, Says Something About Who You Are

Everything I do, says something about who I am.

When I play a game, I can’t just cheat and then say, “it was just a game.” No – how I play that game says a lot about my character and values.

The same is true for my work ethic on the job, my honesty with money, how I treat others while I’m driving – and even, how often I go to church, or in what condition I leave my table in, at a restaurant.

EVERYTHING, that you and I do – reflects on who we are, what we believe about others, and about ourselves.

We may think a lot of the things we do, don’t matter in the grander scheme of things in life. We may think no one is watching, or that someone else deserves our reaction, or attitude. But the thing is – it’s not about THEM. It’s about US.

Who I am, matters to me. It matters to my spouse. It matters to my kids and my friends. And it matters to my Lord.

Companies are now checking into social media accounts like twitter and facebook to see how someone carries themselves. Drunk photos? Swearing in your statuses? Badmouthing someone else? You may not get the job. Because WHO YOU ARE MATTERS.

We never just represent ourselves. We always represent someone else, as well as ourselves. Our parents. Our faith. Our employer. Our church. Our city.

We matter.  We matter because we are valuable.  We are worth something.  Shouldn’t we start acting like it? Shouldn’t we start BELIEVING it?

Dress – like you matter.

Carry yourself – like you matter.

Speak – like you matter.

For everything you do, and everything you are, matters.  Whether you feel forgotten, overlooked, or ignored – you matter.

Start believing it. Start acting like it. And start feeling it.

God's Fingerprints

So often, I ask God for the ability to clearly see Him at work in my life. I want to clearly see Him personally communicating with me. I want to feel like He is a personal God – not just KNOW that He is a personal God.

I’ve seen how easy it is to “forget” His goodness in the land of blessings. I’ve felt how easy it is to feel distant from Him, when I am not intentionally seeking Him out.

I hate that void. That sense of quiet – with no word or indication from Him.

So I choose to rehearse in my mind and heart, how He has shown me He exists.

When I start to have doubts, I remind myself of how He has appeared to me in the form of leaving His fingerprints (and love for me) all over a situation. I tell Him ‘thank you’, for things He’s done for me, years ago! Because I don’t want to forget. I don’t want to forget His faithfulness, and I don’t want to forget how it feels to catch just a glimpse of who He is. I don’t want to forget how it feels to know He is near.

And trust me, HE IS NEAR.

I do forget, however, and I do doubt, unfortunately.

So, I begin again. I remind myself. I seek Him out. I get intentional. And there He is – where He’s been all along. WITH ME.

When I choose to look – I see Him.

When I choose to listen – I hear Him.

His touch, His fingerprints are all over my life. And I feel His love. I see His power. I know His glory.  In these moments, I wish I could always stay. For nothing has ever moved or touched me deeper.

It's Not ALL About You... But Sometimes a Little Bit About You

“It’s not about you.” We hear that so often. And it’s true.  We shouldn’t be “me” focused, in this life. Those who give to others, love on others, and focus on bettering other people’s lives and making a lasting impact for good… they are happier.

But that doesn’t mean we don’t need anything. It doesn’t mean we are content to be ignored.

For everyone needs love.  And everyone needs to feel valued.

Everyone craves touch.  An encouraging word.  Someone to notice them.

Some of us may not need it as much as others; but we all need it.

We need each other.

So, although it’s important to not get caught up in our own crisis, problems, and our own little world – it’s also important to have a support system, people we can talk to, and those who will invest in us.

No one should go through life all alone.

We can thrive on giving and loving; but an empty well still needs to get filled up from time to time. And we can empty ourselves into others so much, that we don’t notice when we start feeling dry, until we’re already there.  And as good as we can be at listening to positive speeches, reading motivating words, or relaxing… we still need others to recharge us and invest into our lives.  We need to know that we matter!

So, if you are a giver – good for you. I bet you have a content heart and life. But allow others to give to YOU once in awhile.  If only for your soul. 

We all need to feel loved in addition to loving on others. Let yourself be loved. Let yourself be encouraged.  Make changes in your life, if needed, to make sure that you get that emotional connection that your heart craves from time to time.

You may be surprised. Sometimes we think everyone already has all the friends they need in their lives. But, most people always have room in their lives to love and be loved on by a new friend. Invite them in.  Open your heart.

And get that well filled up.

It’s NOT all about you. But sometimes, it’s a little bit about you.

We NEED Better

We need to DO better.

We need to be better friends. Better parents. Better fighters, for what is moral and right.

We should speak up more. Speak up less. Be wiser. More understanding.

We need to be more discerning. Gentler. More compassionate.

We need to be THERE for one another. Not just in words, but in presence.

We need to strive for excellence in all we do. Go the extra mile. Persevere. Run to win the race in whatever we undertake in life.

We need to think of ourselves less, yet take care of our emotions and feelings, more.

We need to BE better.

We need to have more patience. Slow down. Laugh more.

We need to forgive more readily. Love more freely.

We need to stop taking everything so personally. Let things go. Move on.

We need to yell when things are unfair, and cheer when things are good.

We need to KNOW what is better.

Life is flying by. Slipping through our grasp. People are hurting, dying, and feeling alone. We sooo need to love better.

I want to do better. I want to be better. I want to know what’s better, and love better.

Do you?

To Be With Someone In Their Moment Of Hurting

Sometimes there are no words. Nothing you need anyone to say. Sometimes, you just need someone to hold you in their arms. To feel that they are there with you in the moment – loving you.

Sometimes we don’t always know what to say to someone else. We don’t know what to do and we understand that we can never fix their hurting heart. But we can love them. We can hold them when they cry. We can be there with them – in the moment.

Sometimes, we are by ourselves in the silence. No one is there with us. Yet, we are still hurting. Still feeling. Still needing. And in that moment, there comes to us a sense of peace and warmth. Despite the grief or loss we are feeling, we strangely feel wrapped up in love.

That’s God.  He is there with us in that moment. In that silence. He is wrapping His arms around us, loving us.

A gesture like that is so huge. So encompassing. It shows us we are not alone. We are loved. We are cared for. We will make it through.

Love is everything.

Touch is everything. It speaks loudly. Its impact lingers long after we leave. It heals. It helps. It loves.

Sometimes there ARE no words.  There IS nothing we can do  - except love. Except be there. Except hold someone in our arms and let them hurt with the knowledge they are not hurting alone.

That alone, is everything.

Serving God FOR God, and Not For Myself

I took a strengths class with my husband last Winter. Empathy was one of my top core strengths. One of the instructors told me how rare that was. “It’s like a sixth sense,” she said. I guess a lot of people have empathy as a complimentary strength but not as one of their main strengths.

It made so much sense to me. How I invest myself personally into everything I do. How I take everything thrown back at me, personally, as well. Because of empathy. I emote. I relate.

I feel. And I feel. And I feel some more. I feel for myself. I feel for you. And with you.

It’s just who I am.

So it makes sense that I struggle in my skin sometimes. I struggle to remind myself of who I want to be, and why I do what I do (writing).  For I can so easily ingest those follower numbers, those likes, and those blog comments. I can personalize them and focus on “me.” When that’s really not what I want to be about.

I do what I do BECAUSE of my empathy for others. For YOU. Not for me, at all. Yes, I enjoy it, but that’s because I enjoy loving on others. I enjoy encouraging others. I enjoy impacting a life. It does bring me great joy.  But from time to time, I have to analyze my motivation and my perseverance in what I do. Is it so I get more attention – more followers and likes? Or is it so that others can see God in me, and that I can draw them closer to seeking Him?

It’s the latter I want. It’s the latter that will give me true value. And yet I still struggle with personally wanting to be liked. Loved. Accepted.  As we all do.

Empathy.

It’s my strength, yes. But I think it’s also my weakness.

I am so thankful to get realigned from time to time. I’m humbled, and thankful to be reminded I’ve strayed off of my focus and intent. I’m blessed to get back on track with serving God FOR God, and not for myself.  For I don’t ever want to use His name, His values, and His words – for my own attention.

“Lord, I am your servant. A servant that does indeed, go astray from time to time. Thank you for lovingly always bringing me back into the fold and never chastising me with anger. You are my God. And I WILL serve you.

Always.”

The Best Leaders Are Teachable

The best leaders are teachable.  I was reminded of this recently as I’d written a couple of articles that were sent back to me to be “rewritten.” 

I didn’t like that.  I felt comfortable with what they stated and how they stated it. But this was the first time I’d worked under an editor. And she was very gracious in stating what she was looking for and why.

I had to rewrite them.

At first, I was perturbed. Irritated. As I let the thoughts settle in with my heart and mind a little bit more, I realized that rewriting these two articles would only be in my best interest.  Having to solidify and clarify my points would only make me a better writer in the long run.

I would learn. I would grow.

King David stopped listening to Godly advisors in the Bible and he fell victim to controversy and scandal. He listened to his flesh and it landed him in trouble.

You see; we can never become too big to learn. We are never too powerful to listen to wise advice, and we are never in a position where we can’t still grow.  When we think we are, that’s the exact juncture in time where we need to be taught the most! When we are humbled, that is when we are often able to see the most clearly. That is when we are able to listen with an open heart, and receive what someone needs to say to us with a teachable spirit.

“Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19:21

I may have an agenda. I may think I know what I’m doing and where I’m going – but God knows more than I. He has a higher purpose and a purer goal.  Sometimes that goal may simply be in refining me in the process. My destination may not have been wrong,; simply my heart or motivation may have needed some redirection. Other times, my destination is a little off, and I need some realignment to see where it is that God would rather take me. Either way, if I allow God to use others to teach me, I will always win in the long run. For I will grow and be more of the person, and the leader, that He is crafting me to be.

So whether it’s rewriting a couple of articles to please an editor, changing some policies within a company, or listening to a teenager tell you why they were hurt by something you did as a parent – each one is important. Each one will help us become better at what we do, and who we are, for the Lord.

Sometimes You Just Have to Take a "Time-Out" From Life

Sometimes you just have to take a ‘time-out’ from life. 

I’ve been on ‘overload’ for awhile now. Getting my daughter ready to graduate from high school in June, working a part time job, planning a wedding for this Fall… and then just adding in the normal to-do’s of life.

But nobody has been telling me that I have to do it all. I’VE been the one telling ME that I have to do it all.

And I don’t. I can’t.

So, for my own well-being, I decided to say ‘no’ to some of life’s requests.

I didn’t go to this last session of Bible Study.

I told myself “no” to going to some blogger events that have come up in the last couple of months.

I’ve forced myself to relax some days – even though there was laundry and other chores to be done.

It has helped soo much! Lightening my load a little bit helped me focus on what truly was a priority and it has helped me start to get the rest that my body has been craving.

Life doesn’t stop altogether. But, you can quit for awhile on the things that don’t matter quite as much.

Sometimes you just have to say ‘no’ to the chores, and watch a movie. Put something aside and play a family game, or go on a walk.

It’s needed. For sanity. For clarity. For refreshment.

There will always be a list of things that need to get done. There will always be someone who wants something from us. But we are merely human. Our energy is not limitless. 

We need breaks. Time-outs. Time to be alone. Time to rest.

I feel strongly about following through on commitments and keeping your word. But there are times in life, where it might just matter a little bit more to focus on staying in tune with your own heart and soul. And to do that, you have to have to be given the time to hear them.

You are the only you that ever will be. So don’t forget to take care of that YOU that can get worn out once in awhile.

Take just a brief ‘time-out’ once in awhile.  Make yourself the focus and priority – so that you can fully be in the moment of your commitments – giving others the priority they deserve, as well.

Everyone Needs a Mentor

When we were little, we had our parents to look to. They taught us and helped us grow.  As we got older, we added teachers to that list of adults who taught us. We didn’t just learn academically, we learned about ourselves as people. We learned what we wanted out of life, and what we wanted out of ourselves.

Some of us were fortunate enough to have grandparents in our lives. Their wisdom was unmistakable. They loved us unconditionally and encouraged us as we grew.

Then we became adults. We started doing the teaching; as parents, aunts, and uncles. Yet, just because our age had matured, we understood that there was still so much in life we didn’t know. We didn’t have the answers to a lot of life’s questions.

Life is ever changing and ever evolving. New situations come up often. New hurdles to overcome.  As we grow in our careers, in our home life, and in age, it’s important that we always have mentors to look to. We need people in our life whom we can trust – no matter how successful or important we may be. No one has all the answers. No one knows how to navigate every circumstance. It’s important to always have someone older and wiser, who can understand what it’s like to be in our shoes.

As we get older, the mentors we had as kids, often start passing away. It can get trickier and trickier to find someone who can lead us not just as a parent, or in a career, but as a person. But God always provides. And there is always someone out there who has just the wisdom we need. Someone who can speak to our heart and our circumstance right where and when we need it the most.

Pray about finding a mentor in your life if you don’t have someone in mind who can fill that role already. You may find that that someone is right under your nose. Someone whom you know socially or in passing may be the very answer to your prayers.

You may not need a mentor every day or for every situation. There will be times that between your own discretion, judgment, and answers from the Lord, that you know how to proceed in life. But there will also be times that you don’t. Times where you could use a good listening ear and someone who doesn’t judge, but is objective enough to offer sage advice. Identify that person in your life. Pray for that person to be in your life and utilize them. They are there to help you so that you can one day be a mentor for someone else.

We are here for each other. To learn, grow, encourage, and advise. To help each other avoid pitfalls and mistakes. It’s not a sign of weakness to need a mentor – it’s a sign of strength. For you have the tool right at your fingertips to avoid a tragedy or life-altering error before it has to happen. That tool is your mentor. Use it. Be thankful for it.

Do You Ever Wish, You Could Help The Whole World?

Do you ever just wish you could help the whole world? That you could help every child who cries, or every person who doesn’t know what it feels like to be loved?

Sometimes, I wish that. I wish that I could help everyone.

I wish that I could give self-esteem, to that teen who doesn’t have it. That teen girl, who looks for value in makeup, hairstyles, beauty, and relationships. Or that teen boy who thinks he has to have a 6 pack of abs, and a beauty on his arm. I wish I could show them that high school doesn’t last forever. That beauty and image are hollow things to fill their hearts with.

I wish I could hug that person who has tears streaming down their face, as they are thinking about trying to kill themselves. Or the person who has no tears at all, because they don’t want to feel. They don’t want to hurt. So they are numb.

I wish I had enough money to help all the Third World countries so that no child would ever starve again, and no mother would have to stand by and helplessly watch.

Oh, how I wish.

Life can feel so helpless at times. The obstacles can seem so overwhelming.

But, I refuse to feel helpless.  Convicted, yes. Saddened, definitely. Empathy, totally. But, I refuse to feel helpless.

Recently, I scrolled through post after post on twitter, of teens who mentioned being depressed, discouraged, and struggling with their self esteem. It may have been something small – but I decided to start replying to some of them and encouraging them. Maybe I’m the only one who will choose to speak to them in their moment of pain - I don’t know. But I refuse to stand by. I refuse to know someone is struggling, and do nothing about it.

There are so many heartbroken people out there. So many, who struggle with their own image. They need love. They need encouragement. They need to feel like they are heard, and that they matter.

I may not be able to help the whole world – but maybe, I can help just one.

For today.

And then maybe tomorrow, I can help another one.

It’s a start.

Sometimes You Don't Need a Plan

I’m a planner, married to a spontaneous man. It’s made for some exciting years. Ha ha – But, seriously, I don’t always do well with issues in life that feel out of control. Whether that’s as a wife or a mama, or just an individual, I like to come up with ways to handle it. Even better, I like to know how I will handle things BEFORE they come up.

But “life” doesn’t always obey MY rules.

Life likes to throw me curve balls. It comes up with scenarios that I couldn’t possibly have dreamt about. Life is smart. Life is always changing. And life is a challenge.

I saw a quote on Facebook recently that said, “You don’t always need a plan.  Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go, and see what happens.” (Goodvibe.co)

And I thought – “This is SOO true!”  Because there are things in my life that I stress and fret over. I try to come up with ways in which to handle them, when in reality, there may be no perfect solution.  Sometimes I don’t need to come up with a plan. I just need to trust God as I put it all in His hands.

If only I could dictate how my life would go. If only I could funnel and channel things down the paths I think they should go in. But I can’t. And I shouldn’t. I know that I wouldn’t learn or grow if I managed everything into comfortable zones for myself. I know that sometimes the best lessons are learned in the hardest battles.

Do I REALLY trust my God? When I kneel and pray so earnestly that it feels like my heart will bleed…. Do I trust Him to do the right thing with that? Do I trust Him to lead me and guide me in wisdom, discernment, and to give me peace as He does? Because if I do, then there is no need for a game plan. The only plan I need, is to pray, listen for Him to speak to me in return, and obey.

I may try to come up with my own plan of attack to things in life – but sometimes there IS no plan of attack. There is simply faith.  And as I apply the faith that I claim in my heart, I can sit back and watch God work. And feel deeply loved.

Putting Some Action Into Loving Others

We do not need new methods, better advertising, finer churches. We need

women with hands soiled in the tasks of life,knees callused with
prayer, bodies worn with burdens, eyes swollen with tears.

- Mildred Bangs Wynkoop

I found this quote going through some of my old newsletters recently and it spoke to my heart in a new way. I guess I’m a deep thinker at this point in life. (Who am I kidding, I’ve always been a deep thinker!) But with one daughter being a senior in high school and the other a sophomore, I’m looking at the life we’ve had, the life we have, and the one that is coming.

Life is changing quickly.

Living in Texas for just over a year, I also see things from a different perspective at this point in life. I see what I want for my life and for my family, and I see what is needed; what is missing.

It all revolves around relationships. People.

We need people and people need us.

My kids don’t just need superficial friends at school to laugh with – although that is welcomed and nice for them to have. They need friends who will wipe their tears when they are hurting, friends who will encourage them and invest in their dreams, and friends who are good examples.

My husband and I need the same thing. Although at times we do have material needs, it is the emotional needs that we crave. Those needs that can be helped with friendships that invest into who we are as people. And we need to be able to offer that to others, as well.

People need someone to help them rebuild that broken fence instead of just saying, “I’m sorry.” They need someone to bring them over a meal when they’ve just had surgery, instead of just sending a card. Words are valued and they are welcomed and needed. But we need to soil our hands a bit – get them dirty and put some action into loving others.

We need to get on our knees and truly pray for one another. Carry each other’s burdens, rejoice – as well as cry – TOGETHER.

There are all sorts of new ways of doing things in this life. Exciting ways. The advancements we are making are mind-boggling. They are fun. But nothing can replace a hug, a handshake, or arms and legs getting in the thick of things and working hard to help someone else.

We are SO much better together. We are so much HAPPIER together!  Let’s help one another a bit more. Love one another A LOT more – and put some action into loving each other.

Sometimes Our Hearts Go Off Course

Sometimes our heart goes off course.  We start on a mission, ministry, or goal and it can be pure. It’s good. God may have called us or led us to that thing, purpose, or vision.

Then, somewhere along the way, that pureness is lost. We aren’t following God’s calling anymore. We aren’t listening to His whispers. We listen only to our own voice, or those who feed into us with things we want to hear.

We get lost along the way and we don’t even know it.

So many things in life are like this. We get tainted by our own ‘press.’ We get filled with our own success. We get lost in the details of the plan and forget the meaning and purpose of what the plan originally was.

Our hearts go off course.

It’s so important to have accountability in our lives. People who won’t just tell us what we want to hear, but people who are honest with us in a gracious and loving way. We need people who have wisdom and discernment – and those who are honest.

We also need to remember we aren’t the boss. We like to think we’re in control, but we’re not. There is a higher power who dictates where we go, when we go, how we go, and when we get there! He can strip us away from that dream just as easily as He gave it to us.

Just because we are gifted in something, doesn’t mean we are pure in using that giftedness.

Just because we were called to something, doesn’t mean our hearts are humble in achieving that calling.

We need to analyze our motivation and our intent on a regular basis in order to keep our heart on the right track. We will only accomplish what God wants us to accomplish and touch hearts in the way He wants them touched, if we allow our hearts to stay on the course that He wants them on. Sometimes we may feel rerouted from original goals. Sometimes we may feel like we are stuck in our tracks and not moving anywhere at all. But we are right where we’re supposed to be if we continue to let God do the leading and guiding.

It only feels right, to be on the right course. We usually internally know when we’ve veered off, but we can do a lot to protect ourselves before we even get to that point. Take the stand today to put boundaries in place, so that you can be right where you flourish and are used the most….

The World Has Enough Talkers

It seems to me that we can say just about anything we want to in life. We can express our heart’s dreams, wishes, disgust, criticism, or opinions on just about anything and everything.

We can openly talk about all the things we want to do or intend to do.

We can say we’ll do lots of things.

We’ll pay back that debt.

We’ll be accountable.

We’ll get a job.

We’ll change our ways.

The list goes on and on.

Our politicians say lots of things. Our teachers say lots of things. Our pastors, our community leaders, our parents…. Say lots of things.  But do they DO them?

It seems to me that the world has enough “talkers.”  We need people who put action behind their words. People who are active participants in their life and in the lives of others.  For talk doesn’t accomplish anything. It’s just that – talk.

I want to believe someone when they talk. I want to trust what they say. At times, what I need is hope. I need love, respect, and yes, sometimes I need protection. I need to trust that when someone tells me something, that those words stand on fact. I need to believe in words that hang out in the air with nothing to hold them together except someone’s integrity and character.

We all need that.

There was a time when I’d trust people until they betrayed that trust. Time’s are a changing! It’s more often than naught, that now, I wait to see if someone will actually do what they say they will do. If they will be who they say they are.

I want to believe. Don’t you?  But we can’t expect of others what we also don’t deliver ourselves. WE need to not just be “talkers” but also, be people of action. WE need to deliver on our word and on our promises. WE need to be trustworthy!

The world has enough “talkers.” Let’s start praying for “doers” and let’s start BEING “doer’s” ourselves.

It’s time for action.

I Want to Make a Difference

I want to make a difference in someone’s life. I want to know that their day was better because of something I said or did. I want to know that they are happier because of my presence in their world.

I want to make an impact.

I want to smile, knowing that I had a part in causing someone to smile.

I want to feel content, knowing that I helped make the load and burden in someone else’s life – just a little bit lighter. I want to feel like I helped someone else realize that they were valued, cherished, and loved.

I want to make a difference.

I don’t want to go about my business and fail to see the tears in someone’s eyes or the droop of their shoulders. I want to notice. I want to act.

I don’t want to ignore the struggle that someone else is enduring.

I want to listen. Love. Hug. Touch. Smile. And care.

If only I could always help someone feel less alone. If only I could help them see their own beauty. If only I could help the cracks in their heart heal – the ones that are there from deep wounds and hurts.

I want to try. I want to love.

I want to make a difference.

I Am a Reflection

It seems like lately the subject of whether or not certain things are “ok” in the life of a Christian has been coming to the table fairly regularly. I’ve seen them discussed by others, and observed people take one side or the other.

Whether or not some of these things are suitable for a Christian to do or not – is a very hot topic. Someone will always feel excluded if one person says it’s wrong and they, personally, partake in that action. They will immediately feel defensive. Someone else will always be interpreted as ‘judgmental’ simply because they think something is wrong. It can be a tricky thing to discuss.

I can hear some people say, “Well, that’s why I stay away from subjects like that!” But that doesn’t always work either. I believe that God asks us to stand up for what is right. So that means that we sometimes have to take the side of unpopular opinion in order to take GOD’S SIDE.

A lot of these ‘hot button’ issues revolve around things like alcohol, tattoos, gambling, smoking, ‘white lies,’ or swearing.

This is where I stand on these issues and others that might come up.

For me, I want to always remember that I am a reflection of my Lord God Almighty. It is HIM, whom I serve. I don’t serve the world. I don’t have to someday account to the world. But I do, to my Lord.  If someone sees alcohol in my fridge and it in turn causes them to question my beliefs, my Christian walk, and my faith – then to me, and for me, that is wrong, because I don’t want to ever be the cause for someone else to stumble. I don’t want to be the hindrance to someone else’s faith.

Being a believer means I’m held to a higher standard whether I like it or not. It means that someone is always watching me. Watching to see if I’m really different. Watching to see when I will mess up. Watching to see if I can stay true to what I say I believe when temptation comes, when trials come, or when disappointment comes. 

So, yes. Some things may not be a sin in and of themselves. But that doesn’t mean it’s okay for me to take part in them.

1 Corinthians 10:23

“I have the right to do anything,” you say – but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything” – but not everything is constructive.”

Not everything is beneficial. And not everything is constructive.  That’s what it comes down to for me. I don’t need to partake. I don’t want to partake. For I am a reflection. A reflection of my Lord.

Sometimes I Forget To Pray

I want to be as ‘real’ and ‘authentic’ as I possibly can while I walk this earth. I want others to feel love, encouragement, and warmth in my presence. I want them to enjoy laughing with me, and feel safe crying.

I strive for these things. I believe they are the character traits that my Lord has. Character traits that He’d want me to walk out.

But let’s face it; I am so imperfect. I screw up, and feel like slapping myself on the head over the ease into which I slipped into an area, that is not an area that helps me be the kind of person I want to be.

I know the habits that should be a part of my life. I know the people that I should surround myself with. I know how I should behave.  Yet, sometimes, sometimes, I just neglect the very things that would help me be a better, more faithful, “me.”

Sometimes, I forget to pray. I try to handle a situation myself first before I remember to ask God to intervene.

Sometimes, I don’t read the Bible. I’d rather watch the news, get on the computer, or fiddle with my Iphone, than read the great wisdom, peace, and direction that God has sitting there at my fingertips.

Sometimes, I sleep in and I don’t go to church. I may have been up too late, or I just don’t feel like going. So I don’t.

Sometimes, I prefer to listen to my ‘pop’ music, rather than my ‘praise’ music. It’s usually more danceable.

I am human. Just as you are. None of these things are horrible sins. In fact, I think God expects me to forget to pray, read His Word, or go to church at times. I think He KNOWS that the music, books, and movies of this world will entice me.

And sometimes, sometimes, it’s simply ok to just enjoy this life that He’s given us. It’s ok to enjoy hanging out with good friends until late at night. It’s ok to struggle in our own skin to try and solve an issue – because then we are reminded how much we need to rely on God! It’s ok to sleep in sometimes and not go to church. (Even God needed rest when He walked on this earth). Rest is important. As long as that ‘sleeping in’ doesn’t become a habit more important than being a part of a local church body where we can be encouraged, ministered to, and fellowship with other believers.

It’s ok. Sometimes.

But if I want to be as ‘real’ and ‘authentic’ as I possibly can? If I want to love, be loved, encourage, be encouraged, and have others in my life to laugh and cry with…. I need to do those things that I “sometimes” forget.

For they are food and water to the heart and soul of a Christian. I can’t grow without them. I can’t BE the kind of person I want to be in my own strength, in my own will, and on my own terms. Well, maybe, sometimes I can – but not indefinitely. I need God speaking into my life through His Bible, His church, His music, and His whispers in prayer time, for those character traits to permanently take root in my life.

I have to be intentional.

I have to prioritize.

So, sometimes? Sometimes I might forget to pray, and it’s ok.  As long as that “sometimes,” never turns into “all the time.” And that is a slippery slope to watch out for.