To Get a "God-focus," Sometimes, We Just Need to Look UP

It is so easy to get caught up in our lives. We focus on what is going on with “me,” what is going on around us, and we get this vision that never sees outside of its own circle of life.

It’s kind of like a kaleidoscope. We only see the same colors of our lives, over and over again. Sometimes in different doses or orders – but the same colors.

I catch myself, sometimes. I catch myself getting stuck in a routine, or being immersed in my own thoughts. I remind myself that I need fresh perspective.

In these moments, I look up.  For me, when I do this, my perspective on life and what was currently tumbling around in my head, usually shifts with clarity. I feel calmer. I feel more focused.  I see things through a different lense instead of that same kaleidoscope of colors. All because I took a few minutes to look up and see things from God’s perspective… instead of just my own.  My thoughts turn to Him, instead of keeping them on myself. I feel HIS presence and His strength.

When I look up, I long to be with my Lord. To talk to Him. To hug Him. To see His eyes land on me and look on me with gentleness – knowing I’m struggling to do my best for Him here…. to BE my best for Him here.

Oh how often we keep our eyes looking down, instead of lifting them up! We are consumed with what is going on in our own little world. We keep our eyes down on our problems, our surroundings, and ourselves. That focus is on what is temporal here on earth – instead of what is eternal – up there in Heaven.

All it takes is a second. One second to turn our gazes upwards to the skies and the heavens. To be reminded. To be restored. All it takes is that simple effort on our parts, to get a God-focus on what is going on in our lives. To get the direction and inspiration our hearts long for.

We don’t have to stay buried in our list of “to-do’s,” or anything else in our lives. We can get clarity and peace. We just need to look up.

An Empty Well Cannot Continue To Give Water

“Step outside of your comfort zone.”

“Be generous.”

“Be involved.”

“Don’t be selfish with your money or time.”

“Think of others before yourself.”

All words we’ve heard. All important words TO hear. It’s important to realize where our lives may be out of balance, and where we may have lost some priorities along the way.  It’s good to sift ourselves and put things into focus from time to time.

These words can do that.

BUT – there are moments and times, where these words can also wear you down. These words – if not used in a balanced way – can cause us to neglect taking care of our own emotional and physical well-being.

I’ve seen it happen. I’ve HAD it happen.

An empty well cannot continue to give water. Nor can a person who gives so much that they start to wear down themselves in the process.

We NEED rest. We NEED time to ourselves. We NEED money to pay our own bills and provide for our own families. We NEED to feel safe in our own comfort zones.

None of these things is bad. They are the very things that help us stay whole and healthy. They help us feel confident.  It’s just that from time to time, we need to stretch our horizons a bit.

We can’t JUST focus on ourselves. And we can’t JUST focus on others and forget ourselves. Neither is good. Neither is healthy.

So if you’re one of those people who gives of themselves until the point of exhaustion….. ease up a bit. Allow yourself the freedom to tell someone “no” and be guilt-free about it. Tend to your own emotional, physical, and spiritual needs. Then, when you are on more solid ground, dip your toes in the water of being stretched again.

This world needs us. But it needs healthy, confidant, grounded, stable, and HAPPY us! Keep that in the mind the next time you hear someone tell you to go outside of your comfort zone.

We Don't Get To Choose What Happens To Us

Life. It’s full of twists and curves.  The things we dream…. Sometimes come true. But sometimes, sometimes our lives are filled to the brim with unexpected challenges, hurdles, and surprises.

We never saw them coming.

I wouldn’t have chosen some people or things that have come into my life over the years. I certainly wouldn’t have chosen tears that I shed, or having a broken heart from time to time. I wouldn’t have chosen the scars that I still tuck deep inside. I wouldn’t have chosen certain challenges and hurdles that I’ve had to face. No. I wouldn’t have chosen them at all.

But they came. And I had to face them. I had to make decisions regarding them.

I had to choose who I was going to be THROUGH them, AFTER them, and BECAUSE of them.

I had to choose whether or not I would be shaped and identified by things in my life.

Sometimes those choices were easy. Having a strong faith makes certain decisions easy – even if the task in front of you is hard. But some of those choices were very, very hard. I had to face my own pride, selfishness, fears, and flaws. And I had to decide how I was going to proceed with my life from that point on.

We do not get to choose what happens to us in life. Oh, how I know we all wish we could!  We can orchestrate and plan and control as much as we are able – yet still – we can never control it all. We don’t get to choose how other people will react, what attitudes they will take, how our bodies will handle things, or where we will be at what point in time when nature shows us who is really in command.

We can only choose what we will do about it. We can only choose how it will shape us.

But from where I sit? Those are the most important choices of all. For they dictate so much about the rest of our lives.

No choice in life is ever small. Small choices always lead to bigger choices. So choose wisely. LIVE wisely. And as things unexpectedly get thrown at you, know that those are the defining moments for your life.

The moments of choice.

When Your Hiding Place Has Become a Home

What battles have you waged in your life? What is it, that makes you feel like your heart and soul are locked in a cage? Do you feel free to be YOU? Do you feel labeled, defined, stuck in a role?

Have you put yourself there?

There are so many things in life that have hurt us. Ever since we were little, we have become broken pieces. Bit by bit.

All of us.

Some of us, allow ourselves to be put back together again. We wear the scars, but we are able to find beauty in the broken parts of our lives. Others of us, we just – stay – broken.

Somehow, we don’t know how to get fixed. We are lost.

We hide behind food and weight. Drugs. Alcohol. Achievement. Success. Perfectionism. Service. A smile, perhaps. But we hide.

We’ve hidden so long, we don’t even know we are hiding anymore. Our hiding place has become home.

Oh, precious soul. There is so much more beauty, joy, and love to be found in your life! You don’t have to hide. Not anymore.

You can be fixed. You can find wholeness. You will have scars – always. But those scars can only prove that you are a survivor. You made it.

You overcame.

“It” didn’t win over you.

You can help others. Those others who struggle with the same things. You can help them find their voice, their joy. Their beauty.

And in doing so – you will find yours.

You will see how your story has made you even more beautiful.

Those tears don’t have to fall forever. They don’t have to fall in private.  Bring them out into the light.

Let yourself be loved. Let yourself heal.

You deserve that. There are people out there, ready to help you. They are reaching for you with open arms. Grab hold and step out of your hiding spot.

You don’t need it anymore.

To The Parent Who Wants To Hold On

When my kids were young, I never wanted to go on a trip alone with my husband because I wanted to be there to protect my little ones. When they got to be in high school, I didn’t want to go on a trip alone with my husband, because I knew time was short, and they’d be out the door before I knew it.

When my daughter was home, I’d complain to her about all the glasses she left around the kitchen. But when she was away for the first time at Christmas, all I could think, was that I wished she was home to leave those glasses around again.

This parenting thing. It’s not for the faint of heart.

You cry when they first go off to kindergarten, you cry when they first drive away with their brand new license, and you cry when they leave home.

You want to hold on. At least I do.

But you can’t. The tighter you hold on, the more they want to fly away  - never to return. So you have to swallow hard, and open the door.

It’s the hardest thing you’ll probably ever do.

But it’s a gift. We were created to do this. To hand life over to the next generation. To let part of ourselves live on in a new and exciting way. To watch our love take hold as lessons are learned in life and hopefully, our children return to the fold – nearby in some part, or merely in heart and soul.

So you let them go. And you let part of yourself go. But in the process, you learn that there is more to yourself than these beings that have taken up all of your heart and then some for 18+ years. You learn that life goes on. You learn how to think of yourself again. You become stronger.

No one will ever take those places in our heart that belong to our children. Those are precious spots that will always remain dedicated to them alone. But our hearts can grow bigger. They can learn to love on others who have empty spots inside that aren’t filled like ours are.

Part of you will always hold onto those days and moments with the best gifts God ever gave you. And that’s okay.

You are brave, dear mom and dad. You have loved deeper, wider, and further than you ever thought possible. You have invested your time, your thoughts, and your heart into making someone else’s life better. And now’s the time to see the return on your investment. So smile. Watch them go. Watch them dream, hope, learn, and grow. It’s scary. I know. But trust in the One who gave them to you. The One who loves them even more than you do. He won’t let you down. He won’t let THEM down.

It will be worth it. He will be faithful.

I Owe Him My Life

I know that God is always watching over me. I KNOW that He knows the very details of my life.

My life is a record of it.

When I was 5 years old, He sent His angels to protect me as I drove across the street in my big wheel, without looking for cars. I nearly got hit. I still remember my sister yelling, and me, looking right at the grill of that car.

When I was probably – oh – 9 years old or so? I almost drowned. God once again, scooped down to save me.

When I was in my early 20’s, I ignored my instincts and got out of my truck to grab my mail as I drove home to my apartment complex. There was no one around but a man at a phone booth. I got out anyways. He grabbed my behind. I’m lucky he didn’t do more. For God was looking out for me, once again.

When I was a young mom, my girls were arguing in the car one day and I got angry at them. I swerved to pull over to the side of the road, but in my anger, turned my car too hard. I almost lost complete control as we swerved from side to side, turned all the way around and then careened to the side of the road. It’s amazing we didn’t flip. And I would have had to live with that for the rest of my life. (Ask my girls. They still remember how terrified they were.) God was there for me.

He has a pattern of being there. He sees. Always. He knows. Always.

Whether it’s my own mistakes, or the actions from others – my God is always looking out for me. He has His angels on guard for me every second.

I know this – because I can look back and see how I was spared. Protected. Shielded. LOVED.

I know I will have to go through hard things in life. Just because I have been rescued so many times, doesn’t mean I will be able to avoid the challenging and hurtful things in life altogether.  And I accept that. I don’t welcome it, but I accept it.

I love my God. My Lord. I owe Him my life. Literally.

How about you?

You Have To Understand, That No One May Understand

A husband can always think that he works harder than his wife. The wife on the other hand, will never be convinced that her job is not harder than her husband’s.

A military wife deals with her husband being gone for extended durations at a time. She will never understand how another wife can get so scared and weak, when her husband goes out of town for just two nights.

They are differences of perspective, to be sure. And life is full of them. Someone will always feel one way, while someone else will come along and challenge those very feelings that they, themselves, have conquered or endured on a greater scale.

Neither person is right or wrong. We are all simply living different lives on different scales. We all have different pressure points that are weaknesses for us. God made some of us to be tougher, and others of us to be softer. Both are beautiful in their ability to handle the life they’ve been given.

The thing is, it doesn’t help us when we are the ones going through something and we feel like our feelings are cast aside, laughed at (possibly), or ignored.  We want to feel validated. Listened to. Helped!

You have to understand, that there are some times in life, where no one may understand. Ever.

I know. It stinks. But there are just some things in life where it seems we are meant to go through them, alone. Only with our feelings, thoughts, and our God. And somehow, we have to reconcile with them.

It is good, to see what others have been able to handle. It shows us we have the ability to be stronger and tougher than we thought we could be. It’s also good to learn to be empathetic to someone else’s position and point of view – even if we feel they should handle it better. We are not them. We don’t live with their struggles – so how can we possibly ridicule someone for not being like us?

It is true. There will be times where it seems as if no one in the world understands us. (As a reminder, our God does. And He’s with us in those times.)  During these moments and challenging seasons, try to think of how you will navigate what you’re going through, if there is no one who will ever understand. Will it change your feelings? Will it impact your choices and actions?

Sometimes the times where I’ve gained the most strength, are the times where I’ve decided for myself that it doesn’t matter if no one else understands. I UNDERSTAND. And I’m committed to my viewpoint. Sure, it would be encouraging to get the affirmation of those around me – but it may not come. And if I can understand this and make some choices that will help me help myself, then that’s what I must do.

People will let us down. They will disappoint. But we can always learn how to take care of our own emotions and feelings by setting boundaries in our lives, being proactive with certain choices and decisions, and finding ways to encourage ourselves and help keep us going.

My friend, I wish with all my heart that someone would understand your feelings. But they may not. And they may not understand me. That doesn’t mean they are right and you are wrong or vice versa. It simply means they don’t walk in your shoes and see things from where you are standing.

Hang in there. Keep seeking God’s wisdom and guidance. And use this time to remind yourself to offer understanding to someone else when they seek it. For you will then know, what it’s like to stand in the shoes of the misunderstood.

Sometimes You Don't Need a Plan

I’m a planner, married to a spontaneous man. It’s made for some exciting years. Ha ha – But, seriously, I don’t always do well with issues in life that feel out of control. Whether that’s as a wife or a mama, or just an individual, I like to come up with ways to handle it. Even better, I like to know how I will handle things BEFORE they come up.

But “life” doesn’t always obey MY rules.

Life likes to throw me curve balls. It comes up with scenarios that I couldn’t possibly have dreamt about. Life is smart. Life is always changing. And life is a challenge.

I saw a quote on Facebook recently that said, “You don’t always need a plan.  Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go, and see what happens.” (Goodvibe.co)

And I thought – “This is SOO true!”  Because there are things in my life that I stress and fret over. I try to come up with ways in which to handle them, when in reality, there may be no perfect solution.  Sometimes I don’t need to come up with a plan. I just need to trust God as I put it all in His hands.

If only I could dictate how my life would go. If only I could funnel and channel things down the paths I think they should go in. But I can’t. And I shouldn’t. I know that I wouldn’t learn or grow if I managed everything into comfortable zones for myself. I know that sometimes the best lessons are learned in the hardest battles.

Do I REALLY trust my God? When I kneel and pray so earnestly that it feels like my heart will bleed…. Do I trust Him to do the right thing with that? Do I trust Him to lead me and guide me in wisdom, discernment, and to give me peace as He does? Because if I do, then there is no need for a game plan. The only plan I need, is to pray, listen for Him to speak to me in return, and obey.

I may try to come up with my own plan of attack to things in life – but sometimes there IS no plan of attack. There is simply faith.  And as I apply the faith that I claim in my heart, I can sit back and watch God work. And feel deeply loved.

It's Ok to Fail. That's How You Grow.

I can be very hard on myself when I mess up or make mistakes. I know I’m not perfect, but it can be hard for me to swallow embarrassment or moments that I call “failures.”

I try to do my best. My best at being a mom. A wife. And a woman. I try to keep my home in order, so struggle when someone runs out of underwear and I’m behind on laundry. I try to be involved in my kids’ lives, so feel disappointed when they don’t want me there or I can’t be there.

Moms – can you relate?

But I’m learning. I’m learning that trying to be ALL to everyone is futile. It’s frazzling.

No one is perfect. Certainly not me. Not those celebrity moms who are back to their pre-baby weight a week after birth. No one.

It’s good to hold ourselves to certain standards. But some standards are too far out of reach. It’s impossible to go through life and not fail at some point.  If we can allow ourselves the freedom to make mistakes from time to time, and fail at things along the way – oh – how liberating!

We will gain so much more out of our journeys by learning to ask for help occasionally, and giving ourselves that freedom to not be perfect, than we will ever gain by stressing ourselves out trying to be something or someone we’re not.

Our families’ will be able to enjoy our presence more, as well as relax more. We will be happier as we learn to laugh at the missteps, and grow and become better from the learned lessons.

Failure may seem like a bad word. But it can be a stepping-stone to better things in our lives if we aren’t so afraid of it.

That’s how you grow.

When You Can't Move On

Stuck. Sometimes we’re just stuck.  Stuck in the past. Stuck in the moments that hurt us deeply. Stuck in what “wasn’t.” Stuck.

We live there, in the past. We wish. We hope. We mope about feeling sorry for ourselves and our bad luck. Our misfortunes. Our wasted dreams.

It doesn’t do us any good to be stuck. It’s not healthy and we need to learn how to move on with our lives. To move forward.

Yes. We were wronged.

Yes. We were hurt.

Yes. Someone took advantage of us.

Yes. We were lonely and ignored.

Yes. We could have been great at “that” thing.

Yes. We are dealing with someone else’s wrong choices and they affected us in an unfair way.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

It stinks. But we lived through it. We made it.

It was in the past and we are now in the present. It’s time to live in it, don’t you think?  Use what hurt you. Use it for good. Use it for growth. Use it to get stronger and better. Use it to help someone else.

The longer I live life, the more I see how life doesn’t go the way we thought it would go. Our nicely laid out plans and paths end up being detours and road blocks. What should be a smooth road is bumpy. What should be a straight shot is full of curves.

It’s life.

We have the opportunity to move forward with freedom, joy, and peace. We just need to come to terms with what has happened to us.

It is a part of our story. Not the best part, but a part. And we can use it to our advantage and the advantage of others. But we can’t stay ‘stuck’ back there; still living in that moment and time. We have to leave it back there and move forward.

What we’ve gone through will always be a part of us. But it can be a part of us that God can redeem and use for good.

Let Him.

Take a step today to move forward and find a new dream, a new purpose, and a new freedom in knowing that you weren’t conquered. You weren’t overcome.

Move forward. Make the choice to redefine your future into something beautiful. One step at a time.

And We Wonder Why We Struggle

Sometimes we want to lead. We want to have control of our life and a situation or circumstance going on in it.  We want to walk in the direction that we see fit, and hope that God will bless it along the way.

Let’s face it, we don’t always want Him holding our hand and walking step by step with us unless He lets us choose the course of the direction we are walking in.

It’s the truth, yes?

In our heart of hearts, we DO want God’s blessing in our lives. We DO want Him to be with us and to guide us as we make decisions and choices. But often, we want to make those choices on our own – without consulting Him. And then, we want Him to stamp an approval on it.

And we wonder why we struggle.

I am so guilty of wanting things to go in the direction that I think is the right one. I can have quite the ‘heart-to-heart’ talk with my Lord in trying to convince Him that my way is the best way. As if He doesn’t really know the BEST way! Who am I trying to kid? My way is usually – simply – my way.

We often operate in fear. Fear of losing someone, some thing, or some control in our lives. Fear of pain, fear of failure, fear of anything. We let that fear dominate our faith. We let it take over.

I don’t know about you, but I hate it when I do that. And I’ve done that time and time and time again.

I want to instead, choose peace. I want to trust in my Lord and Savior; that He knows what He’s doing, even if that DOING might cause me heartache. I want to let HIM choose the direction and course of things – not me. I don’t want to fight against Him or try to talk Him into my logic.

It’s hard not to do those things. So hard. Some battles are so personal and so emotional that it can take everything we have, to just cling to God in that trust. But my God has ALWAYS, ALWAYS been faithful to me. He is good to me. And I want to trust. Not because I believe I will get my way, but because I believe that HIS way will be the best way.

It’s scary – this letting God choose the outcome thing.  I still have to fight against the mentality of thinking that my way should be the right way. I have to swallow a lot of pride and fear. But, I want to know God’s heart more. I want to hear and see Him more. And I think the best way to do that; is if I get out of His way.

Everything I am, and everything I believe in, is riding on my faith and trust in God – especially when I have so much at stake in certain decisions and circumstances. But, that’s who I want to be. That’s HOW I want to be. For I’d much rather be walking through challenging issues in life holding God’s hand, than walking alone and hoping He’ll catch up and accompany me.

I Am a Reflection

It seems like lately the subject of whether or not certain things are “ok” in the life of a Christian has been coming to the table fairly regularly. I’ve seen them discussed by others, and observed people take one side or the other.

Whether or not some of these things are suitable for a Christian to do or not – is a very hot topic. Someone will always feel excluded if one person says it’s wrong and they, personally, partake in that action. They will immediately feel defensive. Someone else will always be interpreted as ‘judgmental’ simply because they think something is wrong. It can be a tricky thing to discuss.

I can hear some people say, “Well, that’s why I stay away from subjects like that!” But that doesn’t always work either. I believe that God asks us to stand up for what is right. So that means that we sometimes have to take the side of unpopular opinion in order to take GOD’S SIDE.

A lot of these ‘hot button’ issues revolve around things like alcohol, tattoos, gambling, smoking, ‘white lies,’ or swearing.

This is where I stand on these issues and others that might come up.

For me, I want to always remember that I am a reflection of my Lord God Almighty. It is HIM, whom I serve. I don’t serve the world. I don’t have to someday account to the world. But I do, to my Lord.  If someone sees alcohol in my fridge and it in turn causes them to question my beliefs, my Christian walk, and my faith – then to me, and for me, that is wrong, because I don’t want to ever be the cause for someone else to stumble. I don’t want to be the hindrance to someone else’s faith.

Being a believer means I’m held to a higher standard whether I like it or not. It means that someone is always watching me. Watching to see if I’m really different. Watching to see when I will mess up. Watching to see if I can stay true to what I say I believe when temptation comes, when trials come, or when disappointment comes. 

So, yes. Some things may not be a sin in and of themselves. But that doesn’t mean it’s okay for me to take part in them.

1 Corinthians 10:23

“I have the right to do anything,” you say – but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything” – but not everything is constructive.”

Not everything is beneficial. And not everything is constructive.  That’s what it comes down to for me. I don’t need to partake. I don’t want to partake. For I am a reflection. A reflection of my Lord.

Things Will Never Be The Same Again

You usually know those moments when you are experiencing them. Those moments that are timeless. You are making a memory and you know it. You are living a special moment with someone, or several people that are dear to your heart. And you know it will never come again. You know things will change after that moment.

I remember visiting my grandpa three weeks before he died. We knew he was dying. He knew he was dying. And I asked for a hug – knowing it would be the last time I ever hugged him. I tried to soak it in the best I could. Tried to take note of how he smelled and felt. For I knew life would change for me after that hug. I would lose my grandpa.

I knew when I dropped my daughter off at kindergarten and cried in the car. I knew from that day on, that things would never be the same. She would never simply be safe in her momma’s world. She would be exposed to people and things I had no control of. She would never just be ‘home’ with me again.

And I knew when I said ‘yes’ to my husband’s marriage proposal that life would be forever different for me. I knew the life I had known up until that point, would change. It would be new, different, exciting, and tough.

Those are the moments.  The ones where you know you are going to forever try to be reliving those hours or minutes over and over again in your heart and in your head. They are the ones that cause a lump in your throat – for you are happy and sad at the same time. Life is shifting. The ground under you is changing and you will have to adapt.

And you know it.

I recently had one of those moments. The circumstances around it will remain sacred only to me for now, but I knew …. I knew it was one of those ‘this will never be the same’ kind of time. It wasn’t lost on me.

I both love and hate these times. I hate them for what I feel I lose as the season in my life changes. I will miss what once ‘was.’ But I love them for I know that there is ‘new’ around the corner. And ‘new’ is usually motivating in some way. It forces you to grow.

It’s a privilege to be able to be a part of so many of these iconic moments in time with your loved ones. To see special ones be married, to watch graduations, to hug loved ones as they leave your life – all – a privilege.

We can try to force things to stay the same in our lives, but change will happen eventually. Kids will grow up, parents will retire, and health circumstances will alter. It’s the cycle of life. And it’s beautiful. It’s priceless. It’s ours.

Relish those moments. Smell them, feel them, and touch them the best you can. For they will never come again and things WILL never be the same. It’s the bittersweet beauty of life and love.

And it’s a treasure.

Some Words of Wisdom

1.    Be on time. It says a lot about how much you respect the person or people putting on an event and it says how much you respect yourself and your own reputation. Relationships don’t build very well when there is lack of respect.

2.     Keep your word. If you say you will do something – do it. Don’t bail because a better opportunity came along. That’s shallow and selfish. Don’t pretend to forget, just because it wasn’t mentioned. Be honorable. Have integrity. Maintain a reputation that people can trust. Sometimes your word is the best advertisement you have for the kind of person you really are.

3.     Repay your debts. Even if it’s $2 at a time. And it takes years. If someone was generous with you, believed in you, and supported you at a time when you really needed it – honor that. For people like that are hard to find.

4.     Reward your kids for doing the RIGHT thing and for being good kids. Schools love to punish the whole class when someone does something wrong. And kids get away with a lot these days. It can be hard to do the right thing and see how it pays off. Let your kids know you see their efforts and you are proud of them. Encourage them to continue being GOOD kids and choosing to do the right things in life. They need that encouragement!

5.     Say, “I’m sorry.” A lot of people don’t own their actions in today’s world. “Sorry” goes a long way. Be the bigger person and take the high road. Be accountable for when you mess up and make mistakes.

6.     Be kind! It’s one thing to feel like we are free in our own skin – it’s another thing altogether to speak whatever crosses our mind. Be kind! Watch your tongue and how words roll off of it. A gracious word draws more friends than a bold and harsh one.

7.     Pray. Prayer is that simple, overlooked, powerful tool you have, to change your world. To change your families’ world. Use it. Believe in it. Pray for your husband. Pray for your kids! Pray protection over your family and for answers to needs that you have. Watch answered prayer revitalize your world and your faith in a Savior.

8.     Love on others. There is always someone who needs encouragement, love, a kind touch, or a smile. Welcome others in your home. In your life. Give to those whom you are able to give to – whether it’s cookies to a neighbor, or a card to an elderly person at a retirement home. Love people. And watch yourself feel loved in return.

9.      Ditch what’s “cool” for what’s “good.”  Who cares if everyone’s seen that new movie but you? Is it dark? Is it full of witchcraft or sex? Stay away. The same goes for fashion trends, books, or anything that is “in” or “trendy” but betrays your morals and values. Honor. Integrity. Carry those with you in all you do, see, and partake in.

10. Remember. Memories can give us some of our richest lessons in life. Is it the memory of what someone gave up for you? Is it the memory of someone praying quietly on their knees in their bedroom? Do you recall the smells of what a happy home was like or the feeling of love and laughter in a hug?  Remember. Even the hurtful memories can teach us something good if we let them become a strength in our life, instead of a weakness. So remember and let those memories build and grow you.

What would be some of your words of wisdom?

Still Such a Work In Progress

I’ve lived 40+ years on this earth. 40+ years that I am so thankful for.

Some of those years held great pain for my heart. I had to overcome big obstacles, inner demons, and overwhelming odds stacked against me.

Some of those years held magical moments that can’t be touched in human words. Those blessings can only be held tenderly inside of me with a deeply-held appreciation and realization of what God has done.

I’ve learned so many lessons. Felt so much emotion. Been brought to my knees when my pride wouldn’t kneel on its own.

I have loved and lost. Held and let go. Laughed and cried with just as much depth.

It’s my life. My story.  Each page turned has brought a new storyline with it.

Some days I feel so old – others, I still feel like a young babe. I know that I have gained much wisdom through the things I’ve been through and seen. Yet I also know that I still have huge lessons to learn. I still repeat mistakes and I still need to be humbled at times.

It’s true how the Bible tells us we are like clay, molded and shaped in the great potter’s hands. I can see that so clearly. I can see how parts of me have had to be chipped away, how parts of me still have cracks that need to be repaired, and how God is making me more beautiful in His image year by year.

I don’t know if there are parts of me that I will ever be happy to see be torn away from my firmly clenched hands. I don’t think it’s ever easy to see parts of ourselves chiseled and clipped away. Even if we know they hold us back, they are still part of our identity. It’s only after they are gone that we can see how much better off we are without them.

Sometimes I know I may be that stiff piece of clay that just fights being workable in the potter’s hands. I don’t want to conform to His will. I don’t want to be shaped a different way. I have my own visions. My own objective. I see myself in a light that I, myself, find fitting.

And yet after 40+ years of learning, growing, and realizing that I am still so imperfect and flawed, I know that I am still such a work in progress. I may be an adult, but I am far from finished. My story is far from its ending.

There is so much more life to live. To love. To learn.

It’s kind of exciting to think that God is not done with me yet. To know that He still has exciting things in store for me.

I am the clay. He is the potter. He’s gotten me this far – I can surely trust Him further.